Who is a Jew?

July 29, 2011 · Filed Under Baum's Blog · 10 Comments 

Every Friday night at 6 PM Eastern Time we video-stream a Shabbat service.  You can watch it live, or you can always catch the archive anytime during the week.  We generally share readings about Shabbat and specifically the candles, challah bread, and wine (or juice).  As always, our liturgy reflects an inclusive and contemporary voice.  And, Rabbi Barr and I always have a conversation during services.  It’s especially fun for me because I keep the computer in front of me and (in addition to listening to him) I get to read the Facebook, Twitter, and Livestream chat streams from all of our participants.  Often you all have more interesting comments than we do!

Tonight’s topic is Who Is a Jew? We actually needed to pre-record tonight’s service because of travel schedules, so this one won’t be live – but it will still be interactive.

The topic of Who Is A Jew? is one that comes up quite often.  According to halachah (traditional Jewish law), a person is Jewish if s/he is born to a Jewish mother.  The father’s religion is irrelevant for these purposes.

This definition falls short.  If a person is born to a Jewish father and raised with a Jewish identity, then s/he is just as Jewish as someone who is born to a Jewish mother and raised with a Jewish identity.  And, if someone is born to parents who are not Jewish but later learns about and identifies with Judaism as his/her religion, then s/he is Jewish in my eyes.

The organized Jewish community is often fond of telling people that they “are not Jewish enough.”  Even if the message is not explicit, many communities send this message implicitly.

I’m sick of it, frankly.  Jewish professionals often wonder “why are so many Jews walking away from Judaism?”  The reality, though, is that Jews aren’t necessarily walking away.  Many of them are being pushed out by the community that does not truly embrace them for any one of several reasons – like they don’t meet a certain definition of being Jewish.

This recently came up in the news when a prisoner requested a kosher meal.  A Chabad rabbi who served as a chaplain at the corrections center asked the prisoner if his mother was Jewish.  The prisoner answered that only his father was Jewish.  So, the rabbi went back to the corrections center and said “No, he is not Jewish,” and the prison then denied prisoner Thomas Feldheim’s request for kosher meals.

I agree with Alexander Shalom, the ACLU of New Jersey’s policy counsel, who said: “Decisions about religious affiliation are deeply personal, and it is not up to the state to determine whether a person’s beliefs are sincerely held.”

There are many ways to be Jewish.  I think the Jewish community is greatly enhanced when we welcome those who want to be part of it.

 

 

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Reactions to the murder of Leiby Kletzky

July 22, 2011 · Filed Under Baum's Blog · Comment 

My heart breaks for the family of 8 year old Leiby Kletzky who was murdered earlier this month in his New York neighborhood.  It is an awful tragedy.

While I can’t imagine Leiby’s family is finding much comfort at this time, it has been very nice to see the community rallying to support them.  At times like this, there is little we can do for people other than leaning on one other and providing a shoulder to cry upon.

I was horrified, though, to read two reactions to Leiby’s murder that I thought were quite inappropriate.  One was a quote from Ephraim, a Borough Park resident and businessman, who told the New York Jewish Week that Leibby’s killing was “a double murder – one was the child, and the other is the image of a Jew.” I am pretty sure that nothing should be compared to the murder of a child, let alone a damaged image of a Jew.  Ephraim is suggesting the image of a Jew was tarnished because the alleged murderer, Levi Aron, is also Jewish.  Personally, I don’t think Aron’s behavior reflects on other Jews, but even if it did the tarnishing of one’s image is nothing I would compare to the death of a child.

Another upsetting article says that “a leading American Orthodox rabbi” Shmuel Kamenetsky has said that child abuse should be reported to rabbis, not police.  Apparently, the idea is that the rabbis can choose whether to tell the police or not; Orthodox volunteers who are part of a civilian patrol in New York keep a list of alleged child molesters whom they have not reported to the police.  I can’t help but wonder if Levi Aron was on that list, and whether police knowledge could have prevented Leiby’s murder.  For the Orthodox community to think they should hide such information from the police is dangerous and unconscionable.  I hope they consider changing their policy.

May memories of Leiby bless his family and his community.

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Michele Bachmann’s Chutzpah Mistake

July 19, 2011 · Filed Under Baum's Blog · 2 Comments 

Last week several of my Facebook friends were posting the following clip of Michele Bachmann.

In it she completely mispronounces the word chutzpah.  The Yiddish word means impudence, shameless audacity, or nerve.

When I watched the video, I couldn’t believe she mispronounced the word so much.  I was totally confused by why she chose to use a word that she didn’t know how to pronounce when lots of other more easily pronounceable options were available (was she trying to win the Jewish vote, and is this what Sarah Palin was trying when she sported a Jewish star necklace?)  She seemed to be setting herself up for failure.

Many of my friends were poking fun at her, and some rabbis were writing blogs saying Michele Bachmann should have pronounced that word correctly – and she and all Americans should know a dozen other Yiddish words as well.  That’s where I disagree.

I think most rabbis and Jewish professionals love to throw around Hebrew and/or Yiddish words.  I don’t know why they do it – perhaps to show off their smarts or to suggest that such language makes them somehow more “authentically” Jewish (my definition of authentic is quite different).  My philosophy is – why use a word in Hebrew when more of our audience will know the word in English?

Admittedly, I did think Michele Bachmann’s mistake was amusing – and likely embarrassing for her.  And so I immediately posted it to my personal Facebook page to get a laugh from my friends.  But I hesitated before posting it to the Our Jewish Community Facebook page.   I realized I didn’t want to make anyone feel bad if they didn’t know how to pronounce chutzpah – or if they have ever mispronounced a Yiddish or Hebrew word.  There’s no foreign language requirement to be part of our community.

It’s time for rabbis to stop making people feel badly for not knowing Hebrew or Yiddish words.  Those rabbis have a lot of chutzpah nerve!

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Women’s Choices about Careers and Motherhood

July 13, 2011 · Filed Under Baum's Blog · 2 Comments 

I was horrified when I read this blog post called “Be Ima – The Bima Can Wait” in the Forward’s Sisterhood Blog.  Before we get to my aversion to this blog post, let’s make sure we’re on the same page (since I also have an aversion to using Hebrew words when English would be clearer to more readers!).  Ima is the Hebrew word for mother, and bima is the Hebrew word for pulpit.  In other words, the title of the article is “Be a mother – put your rabbinic career on hold.”

Chasya-Uriel Steinbauer is a rabbinic student who has put her studies on hold to stay home with her infant child.  I support Chasya’s decision to stay home and do what she feels is best for her family.

What I do not support is Chasya’s overly critical black-and-white attack on women who make choices that are different than her choice.

Chasya begins her blog post by saying “I don’t have time to write this blog because I have an infant on my lap.” I was confused at the outset.  Is it really that hard to type while holding an infant?  Could she not write the blog post when her child was sleeping or having tummy-time or in a bouncy seat or being held by a friend or family member?  Does she think it’s good to hold her child 24/7?  It’s not.  And while Chasya claims she’s not going to engage in work at all but rather be completely devoted to her family – she does in fact write this blog.

Early in her piece, Chasya suggests that when mothers apply for rabbinic jobs in congregations and “are asked how they plan to manage motherhood along with the demands of being a rabbi that the real question being asked is this: Why are you choosing a career in the rabbinate over being with your baby?… I suspect congregations are concerned with hiring someone who is obviously allowing a rabbinic job to interfere with motherhood.” Chasya goes on to agree with that sentiment and then suggest that birth mothers should stay home with children.  I don’t think her reading of congregational search committees is fair or accurate.  And, by the way, is she suggesting that questions about work-family balance apply only to women and not to men?

Chasya says mothers should put rabbinic work on hold “trusting that we will be much better mothers because of our earlier experiences as rabbis.” She doesn’t entertain the possibility that some people feel they are better mothers when they also have a career.  She doesn’t entertain the possibility that being a mother can influence one’s rabbinate.  She doesn’t entertain the possibility that maybe thinking of work in a rabbinate exclusively as preparation for motherhood is kinda silly.

I know that men and women have difficult choices to make upon becoming parents.  And I respect people and trust that they will make the choice that works best for them and their family.

Chasya has chosen to take a leave of absence from her rabbinic studies.  If she returns to school and attempts to enter the rabbinate, I hope that she will first consider being more open-minded and less judgmental of other people’s choices.  To be a rabbi involves recognizing and appreciating that there are lots of paths one may take.  We serve as sounding boards for people – and guides at times – but not as arbiters of what are ultimately very  personal choices.

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